A man was sold a very cheap suit.
“But my left arm is much longer than my right arm,” he complained.
“That’s why the suit is so cheap,” the salesman explained. “Just lift your left shoulder a little, like this, and tuck the left collar under your chin a little, like this.”
“But the right leg is too short,” protested the customer.
“No problem,” replied the salesman. “Just keep your right knee slightly bent, walk like this, and no one will notice. That’s why this suit is only $30.”
Finally, the man bought the suit, raised his left shoulder, tucked the left lapel of the suit under his chin, bent his right knee, and limped out of the store and to his car.
Two passing attorneys noticed him. “Oh my God,” the first lawyer said to the second, “look at this poor crippled man.
“Yes,” replied the second lawyer.
…
..
.
“But don’t you look good in that suit?!”
=====================
Four retired old men are walking down a street in Cooktown. They turned a corner and saw a sign for Oldtimer’s Bar – all drinks for 10 cents!
They look at each other and then walk in because they think this is too good to be true.
The old bartender says in a voice that crosses the room, “Come on in and let me pour you one!” What will it be, gentlemen? ”
There seemed to be a fully stocked bar, so each of the men asked for a martini. In short order, the bartender served four iced Martinis… shaken, not stirred, and says, ‘That’ll be 10 cents each, please.’
The four men stare at the bartender for a moment. Then look at each other, and they can’t believe their good luck.
They pay the 40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round.
Again, four excellent martinis are produced and the bartender repeats, ‘That’s 40 cents, please..’
They pay the 40 cents, but their curiosity is more than they can stand.
They have each had two Martini and have spent less than a dollar so far.
Finally one of the men says, “How can you afford to serve Martinis as good as these for 10 cents each?’
“I’m a retired tailor from Sydney,” said the bartender, “and I’ve always wanted to own a bar.” Last year, I hit the lottery for $25 million and decided to open this place. Each drink costs ten cents – it’s all the same. ”
Impressive!!!! That’s quite a story,’ says one of the men.
The four of them sipped their Martini and couldn’t help but notice seven other people at the end of the bar who didn’t have drinks in front of them and hadn’t ordered anything all the time they were there.
One man points to the seven at the end of the bar without drinking and asks the bartender, ‘What’s with them?’
The bartender says, “Oh, they’re all grey nomads from the caravan park, waiting for happy hour when drinks are half price.’
LOL!!
Hope this joke makes you happy! Have a nice day!!
